Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Vanity Fair, Often Wrong but Never in Doubt

James Wolcott has a piece worth reading for occasional outlandish metaphors and egregious solecisms such as
nativists who wanted to Berlin Wall the border with Mexico to keep out the intruders
Of course, a geopolitical wiz like Wolcott might forget in his dotage the fact that said wall was built to keep enslaved workers INSIDE the workers' paradise erected by Hopey types like Lenin, Stalin, & Nikita K. America is being invaded FROM narco-states and kleptocracies like the banana/coke/ganga republic of Mexico. If Cuba weren't an island, the left-wing Democrats like Markos would have to erect a REAL Berlin Wall to keep the Caribbean slave-state in thrall---only bulbous buffoons like Michael Moore are allowed to come and go at will. Rumor is in the Miami Herald that in 2010, toasters will be made widely available for workers to buy on their $100/year salaries! The workers in Kim Jung-Il must look forward to a toasterless future for a couple more decades, given the current Marxist economy's sluggish growth
Maybe Sean Penn can come over and give Kim some economic advice. But I digress....

Wolcott proceeds to out himself as a Hillary supporter, sadly ridiculed even in his toney NY circles where the Hopey/Changey Obamamania has taken hold among the huddled masses of the Upper West Side. Wolcott doesn't mention Obama's wee missteps of recent memory, but his analysis is of the leftist blogosphere's juggernaut and the weak efforts of the right to copy DailyKos with RedState. Here again, James stubs his toe on that nasty curse of lefty "journalists" called reality. Here's his silly aside on something he doesn't seem to comprehend:
Republican supporters have tried to duplicate Daily Kos’s prowess and bustle with copycat sites such as RedState but remain outgunned. Easily herded, conservatives prefer to take their cues from on high, heeding the droppings of a Limbaugh or Sean Hannity rather than showing group initiative. In the absence of communiqu├ęs from headquarters, they revert to a larval stage of dormancy and let their grudges accrue.

I rarely if ever see references to Rush or Sean on RedState, which is far more serious than the immensely popular duo. [Rush has 20-million-plus listeners/day on radio & Hannity another 16 million---Air America languishes at around 500,000 & Hannity has another two million-plus eyeballs on his FoxNEWS show every evening.

Wolcott sets up straw men [he is an Oz freak & refers to journalists' "tin hearts"] & blows them over with his gaseous emissions. Here is another ludicrous exhalation:
Daily Kos dominates the firmament as the Battlestar Galactica of Net-roots activism, an electronic-beehive amalgam of fund-raising machine, bulletin board, crisis center, poll-data aggregator, diary showcase, and collective mood ring that proved its mettle with the Democratic victories in 2006, due in no small part to the Great Orange Satan’s ability to pinpoint winnable races, mobilize donation support, and stoke morale.

No mention by Wolcott of the diminuitive mountebank's chest-pounding batting average of .000 in races that his band of loo-zers went into hell-bent-for-leather frenzies about unseating conservative Democrats in primary races. And of course, the tiny lefty called any Democrats who would dare to be interviewed on Fox "idiots" and promptly, Hillary & Barack & Screamin' Howie Dean have appeared on Fox over the last ten days. Ouch, that's soooo going to leave a mark, or maybe not, on the two candidates' reputations among the rapidly dwindling hit-and-run true believers in socialism tomorrow. Or the day after....

Of course, Wolcott neglects to mention in his thumbnail bios of Arianna & Handy Andy Sullivan that they both migrated from the right when they saw the windsock blowing in sinister directions.

Wolcott ends with the obligatory sassy remarks about Dick Cheney, aping "Pastor" Wright, who also got those Pavlovian canines all atwitter in his "spectacle" [Obambi's words] in front of the National Press Club while Cornel West & other intellectual giants moonwalked & floated like butterflies, stinging like bees in the audience. A TV hackette misspoke & talked about Iraq not being worth fighting in opinion polls----yeah, wars should be run by opinion polls, according to this bubblebrain. Wolcott told his avid Vanity Fair fans agog with anti-war sentiment that Cheney was dissing Americans who were anti-war by not wringing his hands and starting to decamp toute de suite.

In the end, Wolcott has misfired again---par for Vanity Fair's fatuous forays into adult conversations---but his childish caricatures of anyone to the right of Markos Moulitsas [and of the little astrology-buff himself] make for National Lampoon stuff after P.J. O'Rourke left the mag, precipitating its rapid demise.

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